Wouldn’t it have been nice if we all learned how to be confident back when we were little kids? No, I do not blame my parents for this. I think back when I was younger, it was more about being respectful to your elders, don’t cause problems just go with the flow. Those are great skills to have of course but it doesn’t mean everything. You can be a respectful human and still be confident! WHAT? YES!! That is possible. I want to share something huge that I have learned from my reading and then practicing those things.
Confidence should come first. Im not talking about being that stuck up mean girl you would roll your eyes at while you were in the 7th grade. I’m talking about being a strong yet soft, proud and humble kinda girl. You can most definitely be a strong person and still be a nice person. (If I could add an emoji in this post I would insert the head explosion emoji right now.)
Let’s dig deeper. I want to talk about one HUGE skill I have been practicing to strengthen my confidence muscle.
You will need to start trusting that voice in your head. No! Not the negative voice that laughs at you when you’re really just trying to follow our heart. Yeah, that voice! Your heart voice! Thats the one i’m talking about. LISTEN to her! TRUST her! LOVE her! She should be your best friend. Let me give you an example on how I first started to listen and trust my heart voice.
I use to ALWAYS second guess just about everything I did.. or didn’t do. So you could imagine my frustration. Wait… my RAGE! Yep. Thats right. I actually felt my blood boiling because no matter what choice I made it alway felt like the wrong one. So basically I always made the wrong choice or I didn’t make a choice at all. One situation that would come up very often was every time I thought about making an instagram post or posting a spur of the moment insta story post. I would worry about so many different things. “What if X doesn’t see this post.” “What if they don’t like my post.” “What if I don’t get any comments.” “Will people think i’m fishing for compliments?” “Will everyone think i’m being dramatic!?” “Ok never mind ill just deleted it.” or most times I wouldn’t even post it at all.
This actually breaks my heart while writing and remembering how I felt way to often. Because I remember being that girl. I just didn’t have to confidence to make up my mind and it drove me insane!
So here’s what I started to do. I started making the posts. I started to answer my own questions of insecurities. “What if they don’t like this post?” ITS OK!! Do you like it Chauncey? Well.. yeah I do! Ok! Great! Thats all that matters. Keep the dang post and forget about everyone else’s opinions. You actually can’t please everyone ya know! So the sooner you get that in your head you will feel 100 pounds lighter I promise! Anytime throughout the day when those insecurities popped back up in my head I would answered the questions over and over and over again! Sometimes these questions would sneak up at least 100 times a day! Then something Magical happened. My confidence muscle started to get STRONGER! Those big insecurities started to not be so big anymore. Those worries started to happen less and less each post. Until one day, months later I remembered how much I used to worry about each post I would make and I felt so PROUD of myself because the magic that happened was that I forgot about those insecurities because they didn’t consume me anymore!
I answered with my heart. Let me tell you something. My head hasn’t lead me astray since I started to actually listen to it!
